Consider: People have claimed that the Red Sox winning the World Series would be one of the sure signs of the impending Apocalypse.
If we take that as a given, then we are prompted to consider that George W. Bush has repeatedly described himself as "a war president." Over and over again. He launched an unprovoked war and has gotten the approval of a grateful citizenry for it.
So Bush is War.
Which leads me to wonder...who are Pestilence, Famine and Death?
Suggestions?
PAD
Posted by Peter David at November 3, 2004 11:33 PM | TrackBack | Other blogs commentingWell, if we're sticking with administration figures...
Pestilence -- Tommy Thompson? Whoever's the current surgeon general? Ashcroft, since he's so fond of biblical plagues?
Famine -- One could go the obvious route of Agriculture Sec'y Ann Veneman, but personally I'd have to pick either Ann Coulter (based solely on her appearance) or Education Sec'y Rod Paige, for the way NCLB's nonexistent funding is starving the public schools.
Death -- Cheney. Granted, Rummy looks the part better, but Cheney's the one whose standard stump speech always included some reference to how tens of thousands of us could be killed the next day. Such a charming man.
TWL
who just saw seven secondhand trumpets on eBay; apparently they were "blowing sweet rock and roll"
From my perspective, I would've labeled him as "Famine." South Dakota, my state, has been suffering from a drought for a few years. When we asked President Bush for some aid he bascially said, "Screw you."
So, he's War and Famine. Let's see if he fits into the other two! :)
Administration, schmadministration -- Famine is Atkins.
Wonder if Kerry would have been one of them if he'd won. He at least looks like a horse-man....
- Z
I dunno who any of the above are, but if the fifth Horseman is Pessimism, then I nominate PAD.
Well, as much as I disagree with the current administration, Death has to be Bin Laden. Or possibly those lovely guys in Sudan. You know, there are just too many examples in this world today. Off the top of my head I can think of so many. Maybe Bush is right and I SHOULD stop reading the newspaper....
Death must be Osama Bin Laden (remember him- he's the guy that W. decided to stop chasing after so we could Iraq safe for Democracy, or er, um, Haliburton)
For Famine, I nominate one of the Supermodels,
Kare Moss maybe. Just kidding:)
Well...Famine is one of my rats. :-P
http://www.blue-jackal.com/graphics/Photos/Pets/Famine/green_04.jpg
My, isn't she just an evil one.
Hey Pete,
Would you like some crackers to go with that whine?
No matter who they are, no doubt Carrot Top is the Horseman of Annoyance.
Donald Trump has to be one of them. I'm not sure who. Let's go with Pestilence. His businesses grow like weeds. Or cancer. There you go.
Pestilence: the American electorate for giving Bush a second term, and by a significant margin to boot.
Famine: what all the Democrats will be feeling for the next four years, starved for a sign that things will be different in '08.
Death: my college-roomate. Seriously, I roomed with the Reaper. A decent guy, though he voted for Bush.
JAB
"who are Pestilence, Famine and Death?"
They're Londo's 3 wives.
Tim Lynch,
Just wanted to jump on this thread, since you left the other one, and say I'm sorry some so-called "conservatives" gloating got to you. It seems with passions - and the subsequent euphoria and sadness - running to extreme levels, some people on both sides can't stop themselves from acting like douchebags.
But it's always good talking with you, Tim. Hope you don't leave. (The blog or the country)
OBL and his ilk are War as they delcared it on us.
Pestilence: European governments like France who were involved in the Oil for Food scandal. They sold their souls to countries like Iraq for oil. Refusing to then support the resolution they signed.
Famine: War lords in countries like Somalia where they hord food and allow their people to starve.
Death: Abortion and the "population control" polocies in countries like China.
Well, I do not know about those four, but if they need a mascotte, they can use Berlusconi (italian Prime Minister). He can can follow them yapping and wagging the tail, he is good at it!
Pestilence - Karl Rove
Famine - P. Diddy
Death - The Scarlet Witch
Pestilence - That kid I saw picking his nose and eating it at the "Moneen" show on Saturday.
Famine - Dr. Phil
Death - John Bryne
Pestilence - Whoever the hell greenlighted the "Catwoman" movie at WB.
Famine - Whoever the hell actually went to go see the "Catwoman" movie by WB.
Death - Rick Jones
ok I'm done . . . for now.
bin Laden as "Death." I like that one. I think that's a keeper. It gives it the kind of global impact and gravitas that the Four Horsemen require. AFter all, we're talking about four individuals who come riding on their horses to bring an end to everything.
Okay, so Bush is "War" and bin Laden is "Death." That leaves Pestilence and Famine.
PAD
"Kronos, Caspian, and Methos..."
Heh. Good to know that Highlander fans are everywhere.
John
Clearly Pat Robertson is Pestilence. Disease that is most devastating must be of the mind, and I was watching him explain how Iraq was good for the coming of the Christ a few months back. Like the Dr. Phil suggestion, just not funny.
I'm not sure who Famine is, but I'd be willing to put money that he lives and is working ferverently in Africa right now.
I know this won't fit in with the general political leanings of this board, but I have a couple suggestions of my own:
Famine: Kofi Annan, representing the entire corrupt United Nations. Between their standing around and allowing genocide, the "oil for food" scandal, and a thousand other corruptions.
Pestilence: John Edwards, on behalf of the medical-malpractice lawyers who are slowly killing off the medical profession, the pharmaceutical industry, and the medical-products industry.
Death: I agree. Osama Bin Laden, representing militant Islam. 'Nuff Said.
J.
Well, I just got married last Saturday, and while I don't know precisely which sign that might be, I know a lot of the attendees were nervously glancing around waiting for a plague of locusts to come out of the sky.
Famine--Michael Moore—Yeah, yeah, I know, he's usually portrayed as all emaciated and scrawny but hear me out; wouldn't it be worse, if you were starving, to see some greasy fat guy on a horse, eating a fried chicken leg?
Pestilence? Um, I dunno. Paris Hilton's vagina?
Famine... Ronald McDonald
Seriously... everything that you can eat, and no nutritional value whatsoever...
Pestilence... not sure of yet. It's also refered to a "Plague" or "Disease" in some sources.
Democratic party is death, oh sorry they're just dead. I mean how out if touch can you get, they lost about everything they could. Maybe since they are starved for attention they are Famine.
Death - Osama bin Laden
Famine - Callista Flockhart
Pestilence - Reality TV
Pestilence: That English company that ruined the flu shot vaccine.
Famine - Mary Kate Olson. I do believe the Olson twins will help destroy the world. ;-)
Jeremy says...
Pestilence: That English company that ruined the flu shot vaccine
Hmmm. Acshulie...American company with a branch in the UK that didn't follow the law on keeping samples in good enough condition to use.
John
"From my perspective, I would've labeled him as "Famine." South Dakota, my state, has been suffering from a drought for a few years. When we asked President Bush for some aid he bascially said, "Screw you.""
And yet your state voted for him.
Pestilence: Hillary Clinton.
After all, her healthcare plan (in addition to the ludicrious "liability without fault" legal precedent) significantly contributed to the vaccine shortage we had this year, by hindering the ability of companies to make a profit in vaccine making.
Why people thought that Kerry's similar plan for prescription drugs (which aren't preventative, but reactive, and a shortage of drugs could be MUCH more catastrophic) was a good idea, I don't know.
I'll go with Zeke's pick of Atkins as Famine.
That just leaves Death. If Kevorkian was a more public figure nowadays, I'd suggest him. I'd suggest Arafat, except that he's likely dying himself. I'm out of ideas, so I'll just take Den W.'s pick: Osama Bin Laden.
Pestilence: Ann Coulter
Famine: Mary-Kate Olsen
Death: Dick Cheney
After all, her healthcare plan (in addition to the ludicrious "liability without fault" legal precedent) significantly contributed to the vaccine shortage we had this year, by hindering the ability of companies to make a profit in vaccine making.
Question: How did Hillary Clinton's healthcare plan hinder vaccine production when it never passed Congress?
"Which leads me to wonder...who are Pestilence, Famine and Death?"
Terry Pratchett Death or Neil Gaiman Death? I assume the former, because of the four horseman bit, but I can't help wondering what Mr Gaiman could do with the other three...
Anyway, what about Tony Blair for Pestilence, given the NHS track record lately?
(Given how close Bush and Blair are supposed to be, gotta get him in there somewhere)
Hmmmmmm, wonder what the Kurds and Iraquis think about that "unprovoked war"? And how about Israel that was actually attacked with SCUD missiles? And how about the USAF pilots enforcing the "no-fly" zone that was agreed upon by the UN, that were shot at one a daily basis for over 10 years? I guess yet again, we should have waited until nuclear SCUDs rained down upon Jerusalem...
Osama Bin Laden would not be death. He has said his goal is to bankrupt america...which would really damage world economy.
Osama Bin Laden is Famine.
Death--George W. Bush
Famine--Ann M. Veneman (Secretary of Agriculture)
Pestilence--Tommy Thompson (Secretary of Health &
Human Services)
War--Donald Rumsfeld (Secretary of Defense)
Queen Anthai:
Congratulations! No locusts, just the election...
I agree with Anorexic Ann Coulter for Famine.
> Death -- Cheney. Granted, Rummy looks
> the part better, but Cheney's the one whose
> standard stump speech always included
> some reference to how tens of thousands of
> us could be killed the next day. Such a
> charming man.
That's because Cheney is dead. He was possessed and is animated by Yog-Sothoth several heart attacks ago, right after the 2000 election. (That's why it wasn't released from its Pentagon prison when the airliner smashed into it -- it was already gone.)
And thousands dying at one time is a light snack for the Eater of Souls, hidden in an "undisclosed location".
Pestelence? That's AIDS. We've had Pestelence for a while.
Famine? I dunno. Maybe it'll be an event that prevents us from feeding all the people in the world. Some sort of catostraphy that wipes out the bread basket.
Death? I think we'll know it when we see it.
"And yet your state voted for him."
Yay for blind traditionalism! South Dakota has always been majorly Republican. Sometimes I think President Bush could've declaired all of SD nuclear waste dumping grounds and we still would've won the state.
Maybe people AREN'T paying attention.
It's been a while since I read it, but I think Gaiman did have the Four Bikers of the Apocalypse in "Good Omens".
All I recall was that one kept changing his name, and one was "France" back before France bashing became a Freedom Fries cliche.
In West Michigan there's a cable access show (movie clips and discussion) called "Apocalypse TV" hosted by some former customers of mine. They call themselves the Five Horsemen of the Apocalypse, and their "Fifth Horseman" is Telemarketing.
(That dates back to before the "No Call" law, though.)
I saw in the new Previews that a company making "Family Guy" action figures will be including a "Death" (Grim Reaper) figure (the one that was voiced by Norm MacDonald). It comes with sickle, beer bottle and "Death Dog".
Which leads me to wonder...who are Pestilence, Famine and Death?
Not singling out people, but things related are close. Pestilence... there is a shortage of flu shots in the Northeast. Famine... with all the hurricanes this year, the produce industry took a hit. Prices are pretty high. Death... probably the worst death of the year IMO was Rodney Dangerfield, truly one of the greatest comedians ever.
Boston broke their curse. For the last seventy years there was the thing with the Washington Redskins. If they won their last pre-Election Day Home game, the incumbant won, but if they lost, the challenger won. Last Saturday two Top five college football teams lost to teams they should have easily beat and two other Top 5 teams barely won against similar teams. That's neither here nor there, just a sidenote to the cosmic oddities of the past couple months.
"Surely you meant 'Realism'"
I never would... in that context.
I just read Captain Marvel vol 3 #29 written by Peter David, where Rick Jones/Captain Marvel asked Spider-Man in 2099 if the Red Sox have ever won during the 21st century and Spider-Man said "No". Well, this season proves that it was wrong.
" Launched an unprovoked war"??? Asinine comments like that and thinking so depressingly jaded and uneducated is the reason President Bush's re-election was genuine cause to celebrate. People like yourself have no idea what you're talking about and even worse the world around you.
